A few days ago, I posted about struggles I had with my degree of “success” in various areas of my life. I then related that back to pride and how that struggle could be circumvented by commitment to God’s plan and a desire to seek his glory rather than my own.

I thought more about those feelings because it seemed like there was more God was trying to show me. A year or two ago, I quickly would have dismissed those thoughts of inadequacy as lies of the enemy. If the thoughts I was having were “you’re worthless,” “you’re a failure,” or “God can’t use you,” then perhaps that may be the case. The sadness I felt certainly wasn’t of God, but here’s a “what if,” for you.

What if God was pointing out my limitations in a forthright manner, but I then went on from there on my own power to wallow in self-pity? What if God shines the light on my accomplishments (or lack thereof) in times when I have been drifting from him? For some reason I was unable to shake off those feelings of inadequacy – was that because my faith in God was weak, or because God was making a point that I am dependent on him to carry out his plan for my life and those whose lives mine intersects with?

In the old days, shepherds would actually break the leg of lambs that consistently disobeyed their voice. This wasn’t because shepherds were sadistic, but rather because that was a very hostile environment to an essentially defenseless sheep. The shepherd would then literally carry the lamb on his back until the leg was healed. In that time, the lamb would learn the shepherd’s voice and also learn total dependence. Maybe this is a similar situation, but instead of breaking my leg, maybe God was merciful and just bruised my pride.

Yes… I struggle with pride, as I’m sure a few others out there do and if I brushed off those thoughts of failing in particular areas of my life as just “lies of the enemy,” maybe I’d keep going on in my life trying to do things according to my own plan and under my own power. What if sometimes, the voice saying “rah, rah, you can do it – you’re good enough, smart enough, and gosh darn it people like you,” is actually deceiving words of the enemy of our very soul?

It’s something to consider at least, when empowerment is the “in thing” and the self-help section of my local book store seems to overtake nearby aisles like kudzu.

So, I’ll count this experience as a “praise report” along with a word of caution. Just because the words I’m hearing aren’t rosy and sweet, doesn’t mean that it’s a lie. I’d say the determining factor should be in testing any word to see if it is from God, is to

1. Make sure it aligns with the word of God. It may take some study so we’re not taking selected verses out of context.
2. What is the fruit? If the fruit of believing a particular thought is that I am drawn into a closer relationship with God, then that is good. If I’m separated, then it’s from the enemy.

Categories: Good News, Living for Christ
Tags: