In my experiences over the past couple years, I’ve come to realize that nearly everyone (or everyone) has some kind of struggle that they have severe difficulty in getting over. These struggles keep us from a fully-developed relationship with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We’ll never be totally free from sin so long as we’re here on earth, but we can be free from some of the stumbling blocks that bring us pain and suffering day after day.

I told you about my formerly-private struggles in the past post, and also about some of my more evident struggles in the past with anger and chemical abuse. Do you have a struggle that’s been eating you up over the past few years? Are you interested in being free from it?

I’ll run through a list of some of the more common struggles seen at Celebrate Recovery, but this is by no means an inclusive list. Some are easier to spot in others, but the biggest challenge is identifying it in ourselves. Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt Sometimes it takes God himself to break through and identify it for us through either urging of the Holy Spirit. Most of the time though, it takes us “hitting bottom” and experiencing the negative consequences of our behaviors before we seek help.

I don’t want anyone to hit bottom if they don’t want, so run through this list and ask God if he would point out any areas in your life where you are facing some kind of bondage.

Types of Addictions, and Bondages Plaguing Mankind

• Chemical Addiction – Could be any kind, alcohol, illicit drugs, legal drugs like abuse of prescription pills (I worked in an office once where nearly every woman between 30 and 60 ate anti-depressants like tic-tacs), nicotene, even seemingly innocuous ones like coffee can be a struggle (if I become a flaming jerk w/o my morning cup o’ joe, if it begins to impact my physical health, or even if I’m using it as my method of dealing w/ stress in place of God). It’s the socially-acceptable chemicals that are often the trickies ones because only an idiot would rationalize me driving drunk, but everyone wants to give me a pill if I’m stressed, or a cup of coffee in the morning to chill out.
• Fear / Anxiety – We’ll talk about this more throughout the next year or so, but this is actually at the root of nearly every addiction out there. That was tough to understand – that my addictions were actually manifestation of fear, but for the purpose of this blog post, I’m talking about people walking around that are aware of their fear in situations. Worry is a big word. I’ve met people that worry and believe that if you don’t worry about people than you don’t care. I’m not talking about deep concern. I’m talking about fear-based worry. Sounds weird, unless you’re that person… and you’re getting angry with me for writing this
• Anger Issues - Anger goes beyond crazy blowups (that always seem justified, don’t they ). Do you look at the negative side of just about anything. Do you tell people, “Hey, I just tell it like it is,” or, “I’m just being honest”? Yeah, yeah, there is a righteous anger like God possesses, and Jesus did as well in the temple, but I’ll go on record saying that 99.999% of acts of anger are UN-righteous.
• Unforgiveness – The “quiet killer” and partner to anger is unforgiveness. Anger is unforgiveness out in the open That’s rarely spoken and mostly internalized, but it can absolutely eat a person alive. Jesus speaks at great length in the Bible about unforgiveness and its dramatic impact on our relationship with God.
• Codependency – This is a HUGE one that impacts women in my church and probably everywhere else, too. Many guys struggle with this too, but they’ll never admit it. On that note, I’ll step forward. My name is Matt, and I struggle with codependency. My wife doesn’t believe it since I’m such a driving personality type most of the time, but it’s true. Wikipedia defines it as “someone exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people’s struggles.” (which is why my wife didn’t recognize that in me) Other websites list tendencies to have struggles with other people’s opinions such as problems saying no, or even being angry and hurt when people don’t return the same amount of love, affection, or caring. People who are busy 100% of the time often struggle with this. This is a tough one for people to self-diagnose, because it can often be confused with trying to help others, make a contribution to society, etc. Talk to God about this one if you think you may have a struggle in this area.
• Control Issues – either manifests itself usually in anger issues or codependency. Are you a contrary person who likes to quibble over points that are meaningless to most people? Of course not Usually easier to admit in the American society than the aforementioned manefestations. I have serious control issues – getting better now, through God’s help. Pretty much any addiction is a control issue, because we’re relying on some external force or internal thoughts to control our situation rather than trusting God. I broke this one out on it’s own for easier self-identification.
• Obsessive Compulsive behaviors – Saw a great episode of scrubs with Michael J Fox where he played a doctor riddled with obsessive compulsive behaviors. Ones I’ve struggled with either now or in the past were cracking joints or biting nails. They don’t have to always be physically detrimental ones like mine or cutting oneself. It could be an elaborate system that we need to cope with our day. Goes under control issues, but I thought I’d break this one out into it’s own group for now.
• Eating Disorders – If you’ve seen an ABC back-to-school special over the past 20ish years, you’re aware of the dangers of the gamut from binge eating to the polar bulimia, or it’s polar opposite of anorexia. Just how many women and men are afflicted with a mild form of this? Who knows, and it doesn’t matter. All that does matter is if you do and you need help. Maybe you just have a poor body image that hasn’t manefested itself in obvious eating disorders, but you kick your butt all day long about how you look compared to others and that has impacted your effectiveness of a witness for Christ.
• Sexual Addiction – It’s not just for those hooked on porn or molesting kids. The definition of sobriety in my SA group is “No sex of any form with myself or any other person besides my spouse.” Since God views our thoughts as if we had done it ourselves, that includes lustful thoughts, too (1) (2). That includes a very wide area of indiscretion and it’s not gray. The Bible is crystal clear on areas regarding sex – crystal.
• Pride – I don’t know of a pride group in Celebrate Recovery so this would end up in an “A to Z” group, but if there were such a group, we could just have it instead of regular church services. Mankind has always been prideful from back in the days in the garden and always will. This is very, very hard to diagnose since it runs up against typically American values of independence and having a positive self-esteem. Note that being humble doesn’t mean I feel bad about myself, but that is a common misconception I had about humility.

After reading that list, you might say, “Geez, Matt. It sounds like just about everyone could be in Celebrate Recovery or some kind of 12-step group.”

Exactly! That’s where I had my major disconnect with getting help for my problems. I looked at 12 step or recovery groups as a place for a bunch of losers who couldn’t handle their problems. I was too proud to realize that I couldn’t handle my problems, and had simply developed a good network of socially-acceptable coping mechanisms and skills to hide my problems. I hadn’t hit bottom completely either, due to the grace of God. My church has around 7,500 people in it and only 100-150 come to celebrate recovery or another support group on a regular basis. That means there are a lot of people that need Christ’s help that aren’t getting (in my opinion) a stronger support network and resource for healing than they could reach on their own.

I encourage you to think through this list or ask God to search your heart. Ask him to show you what could be removed to make you a more effective soldier in the army of God. Once you have it, maybe talk to your pastor about it. Look into finding a Celebrate Recovery group in your area. If you’re not quite ready for that challenge (you really are, though – I promise) stop by my blog. In the right-hand side of the screen and below this post are places where you can subscribe to the blog posts via RSS feed reader or via email. That way you won’t have to think, “Now, what was that website with the addiction guy”? You’ll get my posts the day I put them out.

Thanks for dropping by. Tell a friend about this blog or link to me from your blog if you like where I’m going with this, and have a blessed day!

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