To be honest though I haven’t dug a ton into the subject – I guess I’m blessed that hasn’t been a sticking point of my faith. Not like I’m superior in my faith or anything because I undoubtedly struggle in areas you probably don’t. God uses our doubts to reveal more of himself to us. Perhaps he wants to reveal aspects of himself to you through this struggle. What that is, I don’t know but if you ask him with an open heart I believe he will. The “why” of raising/allowing this particular question in your heart may end up being directly related or maybe just tangentially-related.

I have come across a couple interesting resources. Check out a marketing guy I really like who has a heart for God and an interest in science. Check out http://www.coffeehousetheology.com and sign up for the email series. He doesn’t spam you – just drips the info over a series of days because the subscribers seem to digest it best when broken out like he does. Really interesting info (I thought, at least). If you check it out let me know what you think.

Check a few comments up in this. I’m trying to get the threaded comments back in here so reading the conversations will make a bit more sense.

I’ve always wondered if masturbation was a sin or not, and I’m worried that I’m addicted to it too. How can I get over this?

Not sure what unforgivness or even unforgiveness is because Google wouldn’t give me a definition. So for now it’s a made-up word that you get the context of by rereading how I used it or you can just rest knowing that practice of said word would make the baby Jesus cry

I really, really enjoy reading your blogs. You write with conviction and real experience. Thank you.

It’s like the saying, “There are no stupid questions, just stupid people that don’t ask questions.”

Ask whatever you want – this blog is programmed as such to be completely confidential. You can even leave a fake name if you want. Be sure to leave the correct email though if you ask for a direct response because I don’t want to be spamming anyone

In short, yes. Masturbation is a sin regardless of thoughts in your head. I’ll explain… We both know that if a person masturbates and thinks of someone besides their spouse then that is adultery.
What about if they think only of their spouse? In my world, that would be very hard to do. Maybe it’s just a guy thing, but men seem to seek more and more in terms of sexual fantasies. It’s like thrill-seeking. Eventually I find myself playing with Cobras or basejumping into caverns and something bad happens.

Even if a person thought of their spouse 100% of the time, I still believe it is a sin – now, you won’t find that spelled out in the Bible like one of the 10 commandments, but what is God’s intention for sex?

It is supposed to model God’s love for me. That sounds a bit funny whenever I say that, but that’s just because I’m not a huggy, feely guy. My wife totally understands that analogy. God made sexual relations a very intimate bonding moment where two flesh become one and share special (and exciting) moments.

If I turn to masturbation, I cheapen God’s plan down to a physical reaction to stimuli. It isn’t about my wife – it becomes about me. Even though I don’t grow horns on my head, it has an impact in my life. It’s slow, and almost imperceptible but I can tell you that it had an impact on my marriage and my group in Celebrate Recovery is full of people like that. According to the pastors at my church, 98% of the other 99% of the members that don’t come to CR have the same problems. That’s a bit embarrassing to admit about my personal life, but it would be worse if I let people walk down the same road I did knowing what lies at the end.

hope that helps